So the one thing I will say about us Irish is that we certainly deal with death well. From the time we get that absolute dreaded phone call, till when we say our final goodbye is typically anywhere between 3-7 days. And as hard as that time is, knowing when you say goodbye your grief can start to happen.
This Irish mammy is bewildered after experiencing some weird hybrid English, Irish mashup! 0/10, do not recommend!
A very long story short, I met my dad for the first time about 6 months ago. I reached out because I heard he was terminally ill. I had heard he had huge anxiety around dying, thinking that everyone would hate him when he was gone. Although I had experienced much heart ach at the hands of this man (which I now know to be alot of crossed wires and what ultimately turned out to be a big dose of everything happens for a reason) I wanted to reach out to him to let him know that he could die in peace knowing I was at peace with our situation and that he was exactly who I needed him to be. Que meeting him (which I initially had zero intention of doing at the start) to falling in love with him to loosing him 💔
He had spent the last 40-ish years in the UK. Had created quite the life over there for himself. Two young sons, both amazing, but both with their own struggles, mainly with him, but when it came time, all was forgiven, and Martin left this world with his kids knowing he loved them, and they him. Martin's partner Debbie is the glue that will keep his wee family together.
Martin had a UK funeral which was amazing, this was in December, I flew over for it and got to learn even more about Martin. It filled my heart with so much pride hearing how many people loved him, but I heard some of the silly rows too. It's amazing, I feel like I learned so much about Martin since he passed, then I got to know before he did.
Martin not liking to do things by halfs also had an Irish funeral. The less I say about that experience the better, but lets just say that the 4 month wait for that final goodbye has been a rollercoaster. A few mental breakdowns later and I'm in a position where I feel like I can start to breath again.
I was so focused on my goals and career pre Martin Saga, and not that the dust has settled, pardon the pun, I finally feel I can focus all my intention on reaching and smashing those goals. I've felt like the ball in a pin ball machine with the way the last 6 months has been gone but now there is a clear plan of action and I am ready for it. I've been saying for the last year that I can feel something big is coming and maybe this is what it's all been leading up to.
I'm so excited for the next 6 months and what they have in store. I AM READY.
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